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A whim lost in worries. (Judith)

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#51Kaito 

A whim lost in worries. (Judith) - Page 3 Empty Sun Jan 01, 2023 2:46 pm

Kaito

He thinks about it. "Well as the saints were disbanded I don't think that their would be any one connected to them." He knows that is a fact and that he will need to face it that he is really a no body for all the strength he has he was still going to come up short of being some body no matter what he really tries. "Do you ever really have doubts in yourself? Cause I sit and I look at myself and I don't see what the rumors and papers say I am. They say I am famous and stuff like that but am I really worthy of that?"

He knows that probably sounds crazy to the woman that had watched him grow as a mage even if he didn't know she was watching with one of her million eyes that were on the country and on her guild mates. Kaito wondered if he was crazy or maybe he was unwell.

"I don't know if bribery is the right path for me. As there are eyes on me and it may look bad on the guild if I am caught doing it." He laughed a bit as he knows people more fear him for his curse than they would care about him bribing someone out there for anything.

#52Judith Karlinius 

A whim lost in worries. (Judith) - Page 3 Empty Tue Jan 03, 2023 12:31 pm

Judith Karlinius
It is true the saints where left behind, So that door was closed in some manner even if she had a connection to them in some manner. There was always more to talk about but she would just in case mention."Could always ask Kazimir about the process of becoming a Wizard Saint was like."She left that hint for him because it was something she had a feeling would be something the two could talk about.

But now they were talking about something that might give some introspection to Judith herself.But maybe this was something that shown Judith held herself pretty strong mentally and emotionally."Yes."She did leave it a simple answer to start with only because maybe it was better for that."I doubt myself with many things, my leadership. Fitting motherhood. If i am too kind. If I am not as helpful as I could be."There was some parts to it that you might be able to pick up that she had these moments around a fair amount of people."I doubt myself in some manner at least one a week to twice a month."The fact she could actually give a time line, showed Judith was good putting on a front. But could admit things even if she feared being considered weak to him.

However she could laugh at say."It's Fairy Tail Kaito. In one manner or another. each member does something questionable from time to time."She said that seriously in with that laugh either it was taken in a good way or a bad way. Judith had seen many things so this answer could be expected.

#53Kaito 

A whim lost in worries. (Judith) - Page 3 Empty Wed Jan 04, 2023 5:24 am

Kaito

"Asking him would be like asking a stranger if I am honest as the man has never really been around really the most i have seen a member of the guild is you." Kaito says without thinking about it as he isn't sure if it is his own fault or his lucks that he is not closer to the other members of the guild maybe there is just very wrong with him that the others avoid him, he kind of feels a bit depressed now and he just slides down in his chair.

"I guess I more don't want to bring shame upon your name or your house." He isn't looking up anymore just down at the table he doesn't know what he is even doing or why he is doing it he is just doing it and suffering and fighting for what goal? What is there left for him to do to even try to do? Will the gods just forsake it all and mess up the whole system and leave the people confused and wanting while those that earned their place wanting to know why they were punished. "Maybe I am not right for Fairy Tail..."

#54Judith Karlinius 

A whim lost in worries. (Judith) - Page 3 Empty Fri Jan 06, 2023 7:41 am

Judith Karlinius
She saw Kaito's point. In some manner it was just annoying to deal with him going off on his own."Yes...it is very normal of him. If not annoying to deal with. When taking into account a few things I normally do."Judith mentioned."I do have to ask him for a bit of guidance of what to do as a leader....even if he answers how i do answer things."With internally thinking about it. Judith realized how annoying that situation was for some one else to deal with. Asking a serious question and getting almost a non-answer when Judith was just vaguely giving an answer her own way.

As for shame and worry Judith had a different view of it."We all get by with in our means in life Kaito. We all leave with regrets....we live wishing we had done things differently."That answer she knew internally she had a fair amount of regrets herself."I have many and I have yet to let it all go with sometimes the reflection of internal shame I have with in my mind."Judith walked over and patted him on the shoulder.

"I have some regrets from years long before people remember, even some for the most recent years."She still might have a point here one just did need to listen in the end to the words of Judith."But never doubt...your addition into Fairy Tail will never be a mark of shame, Your are perfectly in place in the guild now."Judith said for a reason, mistakes and error no matter what would happen to a person. But Fairy Tail worked differently then most people if a person was already believed in Judith's eyes to be a good person she had no worry or regret him joining."No matter how you feel, I do not regret reaching out to you when I did and inviting you to the guild. I am equally as proud of you. even with the problems that might happen. As a member of my guild."Then well Judith figured it might be good to stop there at this time.

#55Kaito 

A whim lost in worries. (Judith) - Page 3 Empty Fri Jan 06, 2023 11:54 am

Kaito

He nods his head as this was true that people live with regrets but he had killed his own mother and that was something that he couldn't look past a regret no matter how small it might seem to someone else or how accidental it was a sin that stained him and him alone with the murder of some one that was simply breathing life into him and bringing him into the world she died for that. If he hadn't been born Emil would probably have had a better life and maybe his mother would have been able to straighten out his father and stop his demi-human abuse and mistreatment.

He looks at Judith. "You ever kill someone?" He guessed he should as since his thoughts went to his own murder of his mother and how he probably deserved to have rotted and died in his cell instead of being freed and taken care of by his grand mother that he didn't even know was his grand mother.

#56Judith Karlinius 

A whim lost in worries. (Judith) - Page 3 Empty Sat Jan 07, 2023 3:47 pm

Judith Karlinius
This question would assume be something Judith might be uncomfortable to answer. But in some manner she was not uncomfortable with answering. Sin was it's own burden that in some manner Judith all too well about it. Same with guilt and shame."Kaito, I wish in some manner to give you a serious answer to this question....Just to ruin one's own reputation to your own members is something not ideal."Judith mentioned because it was just how she thought of it, it is why she never spoke about it over all to anyone but two people, one out of a lost bet and one out of marriage.

But she let out a disappointed sigh. but it was one a person gave out when they were disappointed in some one else but themselves. The more scary part was how she just stopped sounded like what was expected of Judith. no kindness, no warmth or sense of empathy it all fated entire in a moment."I have...it is not something I am proud of...it wares away at the soul after a while."She felt it was the best answer to leave at that."All results from it....never worked...for me.."But she seemed to want to leave it there.

"Perhaps...when the day is right, I will let you know the full story..But I will let you know now. It is uncomfortable to talk about."To think this was happening and was explained to anyone else you would think it is a parody of the the great fairy mother they everyone knew of.

#57Kaito 

A whim lost in worries. (Judith) - Page 3 Empty Sun Jan 08, 2023 11:51 am

Kaito

Kaito sees how grim the Fairy Mother had become and he hears what she has to say and it snaps him out of it. "Oh I guess you probably had your reasons rather they were noble or not is not for me to judge you." He reached over and ruffled her hair like some she was a little kid to try and get her mind off of him asking such a question even if he is surprised she had killed people it didn't dissuade his trust or respect for her as everyone rather young or old have done and said things that they shouldn't have and that they regret doing and saying.

"Well if anyone gives you trouble I will fake you are my sugar Mama and say no way you could have done something like that." He was teasing her though he is unsure if he had used that term correctly as he had only heard it in passing when some younger man was walking around with an older woman carrying her things and bossing him around. To him that is what it means as he has no idea that it had really meant something totally different.

#58Judith Karlinius 

A whim lost in worries. (Judith) - Page 3 Empty Mon Jan 09, 2023 5:01 pm

Judith Karlinius
In some manner, Judith kept many things to herself that might show the reason for her leadership. Thus Judith not judging anyone for most things with in their lives."One day their maybe people who learn these things of me...Just rather be dead when they do."It must be a strange part of interesting time of events to see Judith kind of almost feel like the downer for once in some one's life. Then well she seemed to kind of just try and go back to normal Judith, in some manner that was just Judith hoping this would not be remembered.

But she did laugh about what Kaito said it was considered some kind of joke for her."I am sure my husband would ponder when I started having such a thing start happening."She seemed to be normal Judith now at least. "But It isn't a horrible plan."It almost sounded like she was agreeing to it.

#59Kaito 

A whim lost in worries. (Judith) - Page 3 Empty Tue Jan 10, 2023 3:00 pm

Kaito

"Well if you are having trouble I will make sure to back you up. I can't say my hands are clean either but most of my kills were "bad" guys." He moves closer to her and he pats her back as she was a very understanding woman and he knows that he is kind of finding himself relaying on her and entrusting her with things he probably shouldn't but he has nothing but full trust in her.

"Well if he does question it I guess I might have to explain that I did it because I respect you and you are very trust worthy and not going to misuse my services." He smiles as he still had not a clue of the real meaning of what he was saying even if he had said something like that might have sounded like he know what it meant he was clueless and might be getting a bit in over his head and might even end up getting a good punch from her husband later.

#60Judith Karlinius 

A whim lost in worries. (Judith) - Page 3 Empty Thu Jan 12, 2023 3:53 pm

Judith Karlinius
But over all in the end, Judith would most likely piece all of things together and explain to him eventually."I am sure if i explained it to him anyway, He would get a good laugh form it."Judith mentioned because being as long as they had together they did have that kind of life where things where understood. Then again Judith also assume most people would not consider or boast about being as long term as a partner to one another. Considering what that man must know. He is either far too loyal and honest for his own good. Or Judith knowing very well she will out live him was not something they had talked about or avoided.

Or maybe it was just how Judith managed many things that made life easy for a person everything simple and in control for a person to be free to do many things. It was many things to ponder over."Well in the end I am sure not much else would need to be worried about with that idea, unless your happen to find a lover in the future in which that cover plan might be as risk."Judith mentioned with a laugh about it not in mockery more because they where both having with in the moment anyway.

#61Kaito 

A whim lost in worries. (Judith) - Page 3 Empty Thu Jan 12, 2023 6:31 pm

Kaito

He looked at her and he wonders if he could really take a lover. "I don't think I am the type of guy any woman would really be attracted too that wasn't just seeking to be famous, plus I have gained a longer life if what I was told is true. So if I did take a lover or two maybe humans and later on settle down with a race with a longer life..." He hadn't really thought about it but the man that gave him the power had said to maybe get two wives with human life spans like a harem and make sure he cared for them through their lives and to watch over the families that spawn from that and make sure to train them and not let them feel like they were forgotten and once they have spread out then he should find one with a longer life span.

He was not sure what a harem was either. "I say that cause the man that gifted me that power said something about a harem or having two wives, is that even a thing?" He looks at Judith for an answer knowing he is probably going to get a talking too about that being a bad thing but he thought he should ask her as he knows for sure that he can trust her and he knows she is wise so he will make sure to give him the truth and be honest with him on it.

#62Judith Karlinius 

A whim lost in worries. (Judith) - Page 3 Empty Sat Jan 14, 2023 5:08 pm

Judith Karlinius
This was getting fairly deep and in depth but alas maybe some listening and. It seemed if anything Judith might have thought about the negatives in life to herself a lot, but aloud thinking that way as a whole was never good in many ways for a person and Judith in some manner knew that from personal and past experiences."One should....seek to learn the highlights of what makes them better, Rather then having what over shadows them become their sole focus."She said it a bit less of the nature veiled covering she had but still with a bit of Judith flavour.

So Kaito had no idea what that was, Judith would tell him."Kaito, I want you to be happy. So let me tell you an entire group of women all solely wanting you love....Isn't something I think you can handle."She did not rule it out entirely but just more of she did not think he could handle it."Maybe if I could suggest anything, stick to finding just one person you can handle?"She suggested, not who to look for or anything just stick to one at this time if he wanted to go that way.

#63Kaito 

A whim lost in worries. (Judith) - Page 3 Empty Sun Jan 15, 2023 5:27 am

Kaito

"How dare you give me sound advice and not let me dream that I can be loved by a group of people?" He laughed softly as he was teasing her but she was probably right Kaito couldn't handle a group of women as he doesn't even love himself so how could a group let alone one woman love him. He knows in the end it is probably just better to spend his long life alone as taking a human lover he would just watch them wither away to nothing but dust in front of himself, could he even watch that happen to them as he stays the same age never aging. Would it not be cruel to the one he loved that they must age alone and slow down over time and need him more while he didn't slow and the guilt on the partner that chose to be with him to have to force him to slow down or to not go on an adventure or request cause they need him to be closer to them.

Kaito guesses if he is going to settle down he needs to find a non-human race woman to be with. He guesses this talk with Judith has enlightened him a bit that he needs to think more logically over what his heart might want or if he crushes on a human that he needs to kill off that crush from his heart if they don't have a reason to dislike them Kaito will have to make one so he can protect them from himself so that they can have good lives with partners that will see the light days and the dark days with them and grow older with them and only slightly out live them. "Thank you for opening my eyes to the facts Judith... I mean guild master."

#64Judith Karlinius 

A whim lost in worries. (Judith) - Page 3 Empty Mon Jan 16, 2023 2:00 pm

Judith Karlinius
Judith was not totally sure how in which her suggestion was taken but it was take in some manner in a way Judith would actually consider positive, It all had to be a bit more thought out over all and whatever he did was still entirely on him. Judith would never judge a person on a way of life they wanted to live. But still Judith felt Kaito had a chance, whatever the chance led him too was a generally good question."I would not be The Fairy Mother if I didn't give sound advice."Judith said with a wick towards Kaito to make a point. What all would happen would be sure left to fates choosing, left for Kaito to be doing whatever was chosen for him by that thing called fate.

But Judith had some else final to day about it."One guide it's members in many ways....thus I guide through wisdom rather then power."Judith mentioned because it was just how she spoke."You would be wise to believe in yourself Kaito. You may achieve many things much like what your heart might be missing."Judith said in some manner felt fitting to say.

#65Kaito 

A whim lost in worries. (Judith) - Page 3 Empty Mon Jan 16, 2023 4:17 pm

Kaito

"I don't think my heart is going to be leading me anywhere as I don't think it is wise to follow that. Got to follow my head and realize that I am not really the right kind of guy for settling down." He realized that from speaking to Judith that he was really not made of the right stuff to try to do such a thing he needed to under stand that he was not meant for that kind of thing he was meant to be a lone fighter that ends his side of the line with him. He owes Judith a lot as she has helped him to see that he was thinking wrong he was looking for happiness in the wrong way his true happiness was when he is taken out and the lights fade not leaving anything behind to need to be picked up or leaving any real people that will miss him behind as he will die in a time that he can not even see from here and he doesn't really want to see from here. "You think up anything new to make to get the members coming back daily?"

#66Judith Karlinius 

A whim lost in worries. (Judith) - Page 3 Empty Tue Jan 17, 2023 3:01 pm

Judith Karlinius
Maybe it was just a bit more time was needed or other things needed to transpire in a persons life for it all to piece together."As motherly and cheese as it sounds, One day in time maybe you will understand. Maybe i will be live for it."She also said that with intent for humour and a wink. In some manner it might be fruitless but maybe it was Judith in some manner telling Kaito to never give up before trying, Or Judith just having blind faith in a person to achieve the things they seem to hang into their mind about wanting to do in life. Or it was just more of the mother in her than the guild master showing.

As for his question."I am tempted to see if people would be interested in drinking, cooking and running an obstacle course all at the time. It is a little loopy. But part of me wants to see if some one would be willing if I put the effort into it."Judith openly admitting it was crazy showed she was thinking pretty hard about this, she normally never worried if something was crazy or not to do.

#67Kaito 

A whim lost in worries. (Judith) - Page 3 Empty Wed Jan 18, 2023 10:48 pm

Kaito

Kaito looked at the woman that was saying she is being motherly and cheesy which isn't a new thing for the guild mother to do but he was not so sure that she knew what she was talking about cause as of this minute the only women he knew on any kind of level were human and him having a longer life span thinks that it is a horrible idea to get with a human even if it was the guild mothers niece which still throws Kaito for a loop as he hadn't seen that coming nor had he been ready to hear the woman say that. "It is fine guild mother as I will probably get over it." He seemed to have begun to close his heart as if he was going to settle down he guessed it would have to be a woman that could at lease live longer than one hundred years as his life was going to be longer than that but nothing he can thing of lets him find any piece from closing off his heart.

He listened to her idea once again and he is still unsure about it. "Well I will hope that it will be a big hit for you guild mother." Kaito smiled and sat back in his chair as he was unsure how much of that event would even be fun.

#68Judith Karlinius 

A whim lost in worries. (Judith) - Page 3 Empty Fri Jan 20, 2023 12:22 pm

Judith Karlinius
Judith feeling it was a good thing to wrap up here."If anything, Not matter what Kaito no matter your path and choosing in life. I believe in you."It was interesting and random to leave it off of that. But as per Judith's normal she smiled in delight."My work in Seven is done now. However I have one request for you when you should return to Magnolia and have the time. come visit when you can spare it."She left no reason why even when she turned away to leave.

Even waving to him."But....until that time. do be safe no matter the struggle."Even if that was a hard thing to do, It was still honest of her. What she will do no matter what. But she was leaving now in which maybe was just her way of going about things, But back to Fiore she went.

(exit)

#69Kaito 

A whim lost in worries. (Judith) - Page 3 Empty Fri Jan 20, 2023 1:05 pm

Kaito

He hears the guild mother words and he wonders if he will ever really have the time to return to to the east or mod he is going to keep on his unending quest to keep making Jewels and trying to make a pretty decent amount so he can make a big stockpile so he can get extra messes cleaned up or if he causes issues he can make sure that he can help the guild recover from it but he knows he isn’t going to lie to her and promise anything. "I will do my best to make it back some time." he watched the guild mother leave and he wonders what or how he was going to do it but he has no idea if there was a reason to go back as he was probably better to just stay out of the way and to try and stay safe from the guild as there was a member there he could not stand being around.
(Exit)

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