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A Cold Lands, New Knowledge.(Nadine)

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#1Regis Karlinius 

A Cold Lands, New Knowledge.(Nadine) Empty Thu Sep 16, 2021 10:29 am

Regis Karlinius
Like a previous family member who roamed about these lands, Regis at least seemed to finally stretch out and explore new areas, his interest however where not flowers, He had enough things to make sure he could live out here.

It was a must different world, In the bitter empty cold of iceberg, It was an interesting experience to him. Even if all he heard was just the blowing wind, snow and snow covered objects.

At least the armour and his body heat can keep him going, But his armour was already in a horrible state in terms of looks, Withered, dented, tarnished with torns pieces of cloth it almost looked like if you walked over to a walking ghost in armour. Or whatever else you could assume it was.

So far, nothing stood out for him to attempt to hunt, nor an area to set up camp really seemed apparent to him yet. But Iceberg brought it's own challenges here and it was going to be an interesting experience for him.

For now it was a nice walking, even if that idea was different for everyone else, in terms what was enjoyable or not. it was most likely scary if some one found him here.


A Cold Lands, New Knowledge.(Nadine) Empty Sat Sep 18, 2021 3:54 pm

Metal bumping against metal, even if the motions were gentle and the noises were soft, was an unnatural sound in the woods. Nadine had to stop what she was doing just to make sure she hadn’t imagined the noises. Upon confirming it the woman stepped away from the animal tracks she had been following. Her first thought was Icebergians, possibly tribal raiders on their own hunt. That made her stick close to bushes and trees as she traversed the terrain. Dressed in a heavy winter jacket and pants she wore no metal to cling and clang against each other, but she made sure to be careful with her movements regardless.

Peering around a tree she spotted the knight from his left side. Even with the short distance between them she could see that the man’s armor had seen better days, and was poorly maintained. The armor itself didn’t look like it had been forged by local smiths either, and knights in this country were already rare to begin with. This would be the second person this week that she had found in the Udgard Wilds, and the second person this week she had found that looked like they didn’t belong here.

The man had some equipment with him, though. Supplies for a long trip away from civilization. He was here with a purpose.

Not liking the idea of sharing hunting grounds Nadine paid close attention to the man’s footsteps, timing her own with his as she moved behind him. She stepped into the holes in the snow made by the knight keeping to his rhythm, but remaining several meters behind him.

Maybe he still had noticed her, but she would simply follow him for a few minutes before finally speaking.

“You’re a long way from any castles, Monsieur Knight. Are you lost?”

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#3Regis Karlinius 

A Cold Lands, New Knowledge.(Nadine) Empty Sun Sep 19, 2021 6:39 am

Regis Karlinius
It would almost entirely seemed like Regis would ignore her. But if anything he did turn his head back to see who was behind him, In which well when you could not see who was looking at you's face, it might be a bit unnerving. Then again he would stop moving around at some point."Not entirely, More curious."Which was a simple answer, At least he was trying to have some kind of conversation with them.

Then again he would continue walking just adding one thing to the conversation."I also needed away from Fiore, to see something new."Maybe choosing the cold winter snow was not the best idea, but it almost did sound like he had a few things on his mind. Might be the case when your in horrible looking armour carrying camping supplies around.

Even if he had rarely expressed it before, his interesting in places was always there in some way, just a chance for it was not something he took often.

As this continued on, It seemed so far he was not overly worried about much currently. Then again he was more trying to find a sitting space. Since he just was looking around.

Then well he seemed to stop for a moment. As in Regis' mind he had found a spot to set up. At least he did not seem to mind this person following him.He had thought he had found his camping spot, he just needed to be sure, after all it was was one of the key things to this situation

Did she knew more about a good camping spot? Or was he just going in blind like he normally did, Not that he expected it to be different, After all he just seemed to do as he wanted to do.


A Cold Lands, New Knowledge.(Nadine) Empty Wed Sep 22, 2021 5:43 pm

When the knight did acknowledge her presence Nadine squinted at the shadows under the man’s helmet. She was unable to see anything distinguishable, but she assumed that was the point of his armor. He didn’t seem alarmed by her being so close either, something of note that she found interesting.

“I see. Unless snow and ice are new to you then you won’t find much sightseeing to do here.” Even though she had said that, the man continued on. With how much his head was swiveling to observe the terrain The demi-human could only assume he was looking for something. Perhaps a place to rest. She continued to follow behind the stranger intrigued not only by his appearance but by his purpose here as well.

“This place is far too isolated to get this many tourists back to back. Who are you, and what are you really doing here?” Nadine’s tone was stern this time carrying a hard edge. “It seems like all of Fiore is coming here. First the Mother of Fairies, and now a shattered knight. Or, is it that you’re after the fairy?”

Nadine's hands curled into fists at her side after her guess. Judith hadn't said that anyone was following her, or that she was on the run from something. She had just been in Iceberg to find a flower, apparently. However, the demi-human remembered the wolf that she had to scare away from the older woman.

"Hmm, that makes more sense, now. More than a Fioran knight looking to play in the snow, and you're near the same area, too."

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#5Regis Karlinius 

A Cold Lands, New Knowledge.(Nadine) Empty Wed Sep 22, 2021 8:52 pm

Regis Karlinius
Any talks about seeing things seemed to not even spark a reaction from him, If anything he seemed at stiff and cold as the snow around them. Anything asked or pondered to him, Was almost ignored completed.

After all."It is a good thing, I do not see pleasantries or beauty in the places of land I walk in."Not at all, in fact he was not starting to set up a tent, A tent rather prepared for the snow of winter and the cold. Almost like Regis had prepared for a long while for this trip, Then he put his hunting traps shattered about not too far away from himself.

People going back to back here? Regis showed up here alone on a boat with out anyone else he knew from Fiore, in fact Regis was not really that known of a person right away."And that matters to me why? Just because I travelled here when other have is something I barely care about."Yet again another rather cold reply to it, But Regis seemed to be well, set in his own path and mission here.

Regis knew his mother, But not by that name he did not keep track of that."whoever this mother of Fairies is, sounds like a lady that would be, A bit of out of place here."Then going after some one was brought up."Why would ever go after a person, I've never heard of? Plus I would be a very horrible assassin if i went to do it, To totally have a plan like that foiled now."Regis also was a horrible assassin in theory, Cold winter armour that makes loud sounds, None of that fits an assassin.

So then, it seemed like Regis was here for hunting, Maybe other things on his mind as well, Something to progress this conversation into a bit more.


A Cold Lands, New Knowledge.(Nadine) Empty Thu Sep 23, 2021 1:17 am

Rough around the edges was how Nadine would describe this man just from the first few minutes of their encounter together. He didn’t seem interested in conversation. Talking was almost an afterthought to him as he went about setting up his camp and even laying down a few traps for animals. Being partially ignored was mildly annoying already, but to then hear that he didn’t care for the beauty of the terrain made her frown. The second of the two she had already expected, though. Nature didn’t seem like something most knights enjoyed.

Again he answered her, but again it seemed that their conversation was unwanted.

“Foreigners don’t travel to Iceberg for no reason. The land and the people can be far too inhospitable for casual travellers. It’s also a very big country, so it’s suspicious to run into two strangers near the same spot in under a week.” Crouching down next to one of the knight’s traps the demi-human inspected its construction. It seemed to be better maintained than the man’s armor, that’s for sure. Nadine smirked and shook her head as she looked up at the man again.

“Madame Karlinius had more right to be here than either you or I,” she said firmly as she stood up, eyeing the knight with a small scowl. “Do not play coy with me, knight. Why would anyone travel here in armor, if not to fight? Wearing heavy plates for hunting makes even less sense. So, convince me that you’re not here with bad intentions.”

Stepping away from the trap Nadine faced the man as again her hands clenched into fists.

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#7Regis Karlinius 

A Cold Lands, New Knowledge.(Nadine) Empty Thu Sep 23, 2021 8:33 am

Regis Karlinius
Even seemingly mentioning his own last name seemed to make him stop completely."This is just fitting for me then."But he seemed almost like he was not going to expand upon it right away."I might not know whoever this second person is, But they are entirely unimportant to me for the moment."Then again it might be because he did not know who the other one might be.

"I am here to attempt to clear my head, See something different and hunt for food."It did seem still like her worried feelings would be there because Regis still seemed just like he was just giving simple answers.

However mentioning the armour seemed to eat at him,So he would stop what he was doing just pose this question."Do tell me then, How many Madame's are mentioned being in that family?" if Nadine want that conversation to happen, She had it now. He did not seem anger about it either. After all it was all leading up to now what he assumed, Judith was here and his mother had already talked to Nadine."No it does not make sense, But armour is good for keeping heat in, Even then it is one of the few things I own now."Even if the armour part seemed less logical, Regis was different to what it was leading up to.

After all."Or did miss mother of fairies not tell you that yet?"So now, if anything Nadine had Regis stop what he was doing to ask her question."Unless she spoke of her past in almost confusing riddles as she has done before, That would not shock me about my mother in the slightest."He was being polite about it, For throwing that in so casually, that part was out this man was one of Judith's actual children, A tall man in armour, That was not really taken care of well.


A Cold Lands, New Knowledge.(Nadine) Empty Thu Sep 23, 2021 7:51 pm

The way the man suddenly stopped after she had said Judith’s last name, there was no doubt in her mind that he knew who she was talking about. Her paranoia wound itself even tighter when he claimed that this situation was ‘fitting’ somehow. Again Nadine scoffed, this time when the knight tried to deny knowing Judith.

“You’re being insufferable, acting like you know her while saying that you don’t. Perhaps I should help you clear your head?”

She took several steps towards the man, but stopped when he asked his question. The nature of his query proved beyond a shadow of a doubt in her mind that he did in fact know Judith. Him being difficult and refusing to identify himself however was still making her impatient, as evident from her narrowing stare. She had more questions about his armor, but the knight insisted on an answer to his question. He then dropped a piece of information that wiped off most of the aggression from Nadine’s face.

Nadine took a few long moments to think silently to herself while studying the knight. Judith had talked about her oldest son, Regis. She hadn’t mentioned what he looked like, though.

“There were three women in the family,” she finally said with a frown not liking that she was on the defensive now, “and a fourth girl, counting the grandchild. Madame Karlinius did mention she had sons, but spoke nothing about what they looked like. So which one are you, the youngest, or the oldest?”

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#9Regis Karlinius 

A Cold Lands, New Knowledge.(Nadine) Empty Fri Sep 24, 2021 6:39 am

Regis Karlinius
This was most likely about to get a tiny bit more annoying to Nadine."I am the one who is considered insufferable? I am not going around thinking some one is here to murder a person just off of looking at them."Either Regis was about to burying himself into a massive hole or just continue getting the into a pointless argument with a lady he just met. Regis was stubborn in some manner with his mind being at the way it was."I would have just left continued on my way with out a word and said nothing, Rather then point a finger."But he was still not really annoyed or upset about it.

But alas in some manner she was told."Ahh, So she told you then, Glad she is managing it well."In some manner that seemed like he might be a slightly, Maybe at least in some manner they might not try to butt heads."Since my sister's death everyone seems to have been quietly hiding away."Maybe they where truly a family of hermits and Judith was trying to keep it together alone, it almost seemed a bit depressing.

Regis did not try and joke about it either."I am not my youngest who is the tea seller."So that would rule out Waylon the youngest if Nadine had that in mind."So if you really must know, I am the oldest one."So the thing Nadine was sad about story wise with in Judith's life. Next to her daughter's death. The cause of it was standing in front of her. He was Regis, he was just not out right saying his name.

Maybe it seemed Judina's death, along with what he had happen in his life, Maybe it made sense why he was hiding somewhere.


A Cold Lands, New Knowledge.(Nadine) Empty Mon Sep 27, 2021 2:38 am

The knight tried to give his perspective on the situation, but Nadine felt her jaw clench behind her own stubborn frown. Perhaps they had both been antagonizing each other, but she had given him more than enough time to introduce himself and clear things up. His refusal to even consider that he looked suspicious also grated on her patience, but now that he was explaining things it was getting harder to justify hitting the man.

“She is managing very well if she was able to come here alone. I believe her husband is also doing well.” The demi-human was back on alert though when the man finally identified who he was. Judith’s oldest son, Regis Karlinius. Apprehension returned to her expression, but she was not afraid of the man as she glared at him. Judith had said that her son was living quietly and peacefully in a forest. That didn’t change the fact that he had gone mad before and killed his wife and daughter. For a few seconds she simply stood there glaring at the man, unsure of what to do.

Finally, Nadine’s shoulders rose and fell with a heavy sigh. She did not look happy, but she did not look angry anymore, either.

“You’re not going to catch anything wearing that armor. Not without bait.” Not waiting for Regis to make another debate, the woman knelt down as she retrieved a small pouch from her pocket. Carefully, she shook out seeds from the pouch onto the snow before separating them and pushing them into the ground with her finger. After returning the pouch to her pocket Nadine held her hands over the ground, and a magic seal appeared with swirling green and blue colors.

“Your mother, she was very kind to me when we met. So I am returning the favor. My name is Nadine, and you are Regis.” Below her hands the seeds started to grow and sprout in seconds, forming a small cluster of carrots. She looked up at Regis with a raised brow. "Don't misbehave, or I will do more then tell your mother. My kindness is not as patient as hers."

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#11Regis Karlinius 

A Cold Lands, New Knowledge.(Nadine) Empty Mon Sep 27, 2021 1:51 pm

Regis Karlinius
With that Regis seemed to continue sitting up camp, He was not ignoring her completely just kind of the person he was, Considering maybe that fact he was stuck most of the time alone, his normal life was not really much talking of socializing."Good good, I don't have to attempt to check on her for a long time now."A casual mention, as Regis just seemed to no longer pay attention to any of the trap he has just laid on the ground, After all they were not set up yet to be of use.

Then also remarking."Same with my father."That part well, almost could feel a bit bitter for him but he still did not wish anything horrible on him, They just had their problems after what happen. But at least he was alive and actually seen for once in his life, Just better yet you could see Regis as a man life in life, unsure how to continue it beyond what was known to have happen to him, Maybe he was stuck in a cycle of guilt, It was hard to tell and maybe Regis himself knew that and it was intention that way, hiding behind what he could to cover himself up.

"I was not expecting to catch anything right away,I more was making sure, I don't freeze to death out here."heat build up was a thing that could happen with that kind of armour, Then again maybe in reality still Regis might not have anything else but the armour at this point."Indeed, She has always been that way, I swear she even tries to seek me to leave things for me..."He did not sound annoyed if anything he still sounded a bit more depressed about it. Given what Nadine knew there was a fairly logical feeling that he did not feel he deserved it, Judith was just imposing and forcing it upon him.

With that final part for the moment he just mentioned to her."Given you do not know my normal behaviour all that much yet, I do not see how I could you personally do more."It was most likely a slap back at him, But this just seemed to be him, But at least he set up that fairly large tent with out problem, It was kept in a good condition there was no sign of snow getting into the tent when it was closed.

Then well, Regis would not give Nadine as much slap back."But I do thank you for the offer of bait, It shortens my to do list."Then well for the moment Regis just turn his back to Nadine and took off his helmet, so far she could not see his face but could see that his dark blue hair, Was not really well taken care of and almost matted, He must not have the supplies for such care on him anymore. The hair also looked a bit damp from sweat.


A Cold Lands, New Knowledge.(Nadine) Empty Sun Oct 03, 2021 11:38 pm

From what she could remember from her talk with Judith, Regis lived a hermit life in the woods and she checked in on her son from time to time. The knight claimed that he was the one who wouldn’t have to check in now, and that made the woman wonder about the truth of that. Did the man bother visiting his parents at all? His mother felt it necessary to venture out to find him herself, after all. Even if Regis was living alone with guilt as his only companion, was he trying to lie to Nadine, or himself here? The woman just gave him a doubtful stare as a reply to his initial comments.

“I can see why she leaves you things. You are unprepared and helpless, like a newborn fawn. You are not ready to be in these lands if you disrespect it with such casual disregard for its dangers.” Her words were harsh, but her tone was simply firm like an instructor trying to convey the importance of a lesson to a student. She plucked the carrots from the ground and then stood up, staring back at Regis with an unimpressed look.

“These are the Udgard Wilds, Knight. Animals aren’t the only danger here. The weather and the local tribesmen kill more travelers than the beasts. I’ve been here for a month now alone, except for the one night your mother gave me shelter. Yes, I do not know what your normal behavior is, but do not make the mistake of thinking I am afraid of you.”

Once more her tone was firm, but not aggressive. She would defend herself if she had to, especially if Regis suffered another bout of homicidal madness. He seemed to be okay and coherent now, at least.

“You’re welcome,”
she said in reply to his gratitude. Nadine walked to Regis’ tent to leave the small pile of carrots next to it. As she passed by Regis she noticed him removing his helmet, and what else could she do but be nosy? The state of his hair just reminded her of what she had said earlier: the man was helpless. Not only was his armor in poor condition, but his personal hygiene seemed to be lacking as well. Again, she could now begin to understand why Judith was so concerned about him.

“You can at least start a fire, yes? I am already helping you, and it would be very rude if you did something silly like freeze to death.”

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#13Regis Karlinius 

A Cold Lands, New Knowledge.(Nadine) Empty Mon Oct 04, 2021 7:46 am

Regis Karlinius
It would sound like he was denying one of these parts, which would most likely cement that Regis was more of less leaving himself this way out of his own despair, The best way was to think think about he was lying to himself over all and just kept going."Even if unprepared, I am alive and breathing, That should be good enough."There was a small hint that he already knew he was helpless, Just trying not really to seem it only out of being use to it. In some manner Regis knew he might have been weak in some manner because of this, Just too stubborn to give up."I get by as it stands, So I will manage to survive here too."It was still him being stubborn about it.

Scratching some where of his hair, even some of the unkempt facial hair, It looked like he just horrible cut it with a knife so he would not have to tuck it into the armour he was wearing, Then again he had not brushed his hair in a long time, But there was signs that he attempted to keep dirt,leaves and stick out of it. It was all dark blue in terms of his hair, his eyes were dark blue as well, Walking over to Nadine and pat his hand on one of her shoulders."I thank you for your warning, I can also at least thank you for not being scared of me."These words would be the sign of the actual Regis, not the person walking with in his own despair. Showing It was something that was keeping him feeling some what normal.

"Yes I can at least start a fire, I was just going to set up the tent before getting the wood needed for the fire."He had a plan, With what little he had on him, Looking at the things he had around, Regis seemed to only have a way to spark a fire, He just did not have wood, Most likely for this travel he was going to get some now.

Regis checking over how well his tents where set up, He did not check the trap since in some manner he did actually, Set the carrot into the trap  after they where finished sprouting out. Getting them from Nadine, Much like as if he seem some what horrible with his hygiene, Regis did still only slightly horrible, most likely he still bathed just did not have the soap or anything of the sort to keep him clean.

After getting up the camp and the traps, Regis then quietly picked up his helmet and started venturing to find trees for wood, weather Nadine actually would follow him, Regis seemed entirely up to her, Regis seemed to carry minimal things to only collect everything else later, Signs of him wanting to be what he use too still lingered, But what griped hold of him also showed, The person who always walked in the past trying to move on from it.


A Cold Lands, New Knowledge.(Nadine) Empty Tue Oct 12, 2021 6:43 pm

Alive and breathing was hardly what Nadine would call ‘good enough’ for a person to survive. If anything, it was an indication of Regis’ depression. Again she was reminded of her talk with Judith, about her worry regarding the dangers of starting a family. The demi-human couldn’t imagine what it might be like to kill a lover and your own child during a fit of insanity, or what it would be like to live with something like that weighing on your conscience. She gave the man an unsatisfied stare either way, not liking his attitude about things.

That expression softened a degree when Regis thanked her for her help.

“The only thing that you would frighten here are the rabbits, but you are welcome.” With the two of them being so close together it was easier to study his features. He looked about what she would expect from a homeless vagrant wandering the wilds of nature as well as the jungle of depression. Although, his eyes surprised her, and not because of their color. It was because she still saw the spark of humanity in them, even if that glint was beaten down by the misfortunes of life. There was also something else she noticed, and it made her nose scrunch up in distaste.

“Yes, go get the wood,” she said as she gave him a playful shove as she stepped away. “Alive and breathing is fine for surviving in Fiore, but that is not adequate for surviving in Iceberg. I will stay here and continue preparing so the armored fawn survives its first real winter.”

Nadine walked near Regis’ tent and continued to grow several plants with her magic. This time she was growing things for eating like potatoes and onions. She also grew lavender, although if Regis noticed the purple flowers the woman didn’t bother explaining why she was bothering with a fragrant plant.

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#15Regis Karlinius 

A Cold Lands, New Knowledge.(Nadine) Empty Wed Oct 13, 2021 2:42 pm

Regis Karlinius
It seemed he could just kind of settle about in a more quiet manner then again for now a parting words even if he was not going to be gone long would still be needed."Any one can scare rabbits, Even you can,Good thing I am not one."The most simple of replies to it in which was not super shocking in the end to expect to hear in return consider how Regis was already a kind of lonely soul, Maybe he still had no idea have to take a compliment anymore either, For the year might have just gone by for him and he never realized only just managing a day at a time.

But nonetheless Regis seemed to quietly continue walking away towards that path of getting the wood he needed for the fire. While wondering if he was really just gonna be as risk here or if he was just gonna continue living as he was currently, Since he some how continually just exist as he was now. Then again these two were only just kind of knowing starting whatever this turn out to be.

Regis pondering to himself if he should really continue trying to acting the way he was to some one who was acting honestly in some manner trying to help him, At least it was something to ponder over while he broke some trees down for the wood. By that he broke the trees with hist hands hands even then the armour that might help him but it was easy to pick up he was breaking down trees in the background.

But after he broke down about three fairly decent sized tree easily noticed the sound of breaking them as he was. Regis would quietly come back with the various broken down trees, If anything he had not really notice anything Nadine could have set up here because his mind was on the task of getting this firewood and not anything else.

But he was back at the camp after a small amount time, Settling the trees he broke down on the ground close by the tent.


A Cold Lands, New Knowledge.(Nadine) Empty Sun Oct 24, 2021 4:45 am

It was indeed a good thing that Regis was not a rabbit; Nadine happened to like roasted rabbit.

As the knight took his time gathering firewood she had already grown a small pile of potatoes. She had also grown more carrots for bait, and both types of vegetables were left inside the man’s tent. The holes she had made in the ground were refilled by shifting the dirt around with water magic, and over that she regrew the grass as well to return the environment to how it was before.

The last two things she did before Regis returned to camp was clear a spot for a fire, and cut a log in two for makeshift seats placing them on opposite sides of the fireplace. As the knight set his firewood down Nadine called out to him.

“Hey, see if you can get a fire started here. I need to heat up a lot of water. Unless you prefer a cold bath?” The demi-human didn’t really explain what she meant by that. Instead she walked over to where her lavender plants were growing and knelt beside them to pluck a few sprigs from the cluster. “You are bad at first impressions, no? Fear not, my armored fawn, I have met worse. So long as I am helping you though, you are not going to look like I dragged you out of the Svartmire.”

The woman rose to her feet with a handful of lavender sprigs. Now that she thought about it, she personally would have been mortified if Judith had found her in such a bad shape like Regis was in. Even out in the wilds Nadine regularly cleaned herself, but that was an easy task with water magic.

“So, cold or hot?” she asked as she glanced at the man.

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#17Regis Karlinius 

A Cold Lands, New Knowledge.(Nadine) Empty Sun Oct 24, 2021 9:06 am

Regis Karlinius
It was fairly simple to follow along with what was mentioned, Quietly and slowly setting up a fire, But he had to slowly wonder what she was planning. Then again slowly."I would rather not freeze to death here, Thank you for the option.I will take hot."making it clear it was choose hot or warm over cold. Internally Regis could still be pondering why this lady was helping him, Most people just left him to be or fled because well he did not exactly look like he was living or friendly, Long gone were the days of making painful grunts and screams of pain only being able to move one arm and eating rabbits or whatever animals he could get his hands on raw.

Taking off one of the metal pieces he had that covered one of his arms up to his elbow,to took to parts of it to use to spark the fire, after gathering it into a fitting place Regis seemed to not have any problems in terms of starting a fire.

But he has to ask at this point, since he was curious, Then again Regis was a man of few words most of the time."Why?" Even if it was not much of a detailed question considering what was set up it was most likely a simple thing to figure out."Why are you doing all of this exactly?"It was not that Regis might not be grateful after all of this was said and done, But he still felt like he needed to know, After all no one generally was going this far for him currently.

So it would be a good question to ask, At least to him, So far at least he was not refusing what was going on,most likely because he knew he might actually need it, Just only delaying it, Even when he had options to help him in Fiore.

Regis was not sure what kind of answer to be expecting, Nor was he seemingly in a rush to take anything else to bath right away either, Most likely valuing the answer more then being clean. Even looking past the mention of first impressions after all he was not intending anything of that manner either, At least not intentionally. To Regis was just thinking he was an unhappy lonely man, felt to being this way because of his own doing.

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