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The easter bunny

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#1Requiem 

The easter bunny Empty on Fri Apr 17, 2020 7:01 pm

Requiem
Requiem could feel her blood pressure rising as she stared at the creature in front of her, "Could....could you repeat that?"
"Hippity hoppity it's time to hunt or the fun won't stoppity!"
......
......
*twitch**twitch*
"Whyyyyy......?"
"Because because all is good fun when you find treasure!"
Requiem wondered how she ended up in this situa.....oh, right.

(About ten minutes ago)
"Let's see...is there anything I want to make for easter dinner?" The up and coming huntress type mage looked at the food stalls as she tried to decide what to make for the night, "maybe I should make something grand for the whole guild. Hmmm....except.....I don't know what they like" Requiem hung her head at the realization that it never occurred to her to ask them. Her "oh shit" senses went off and Requiem glanced around before locking onto a strange bush.

Oh, wait.

That rabbit shaped bush was also rabbit colored. And moving. And talking.

Wait what?

(Back to the present future)

"Hoppity boppity, so thems the rules ready for fun?"
"If....it....gets....you.....off... of....my.....head....yes." Requiem's neck and back were starting to get sore from when the rabbit decided to jump on her head. The obnoxious creature hopped off her head and perched itself on her bust, "yaaay!" It kicked off and raced away. Requiem groaned as she massaged were the little shit's feet kicked her, "new life goal, murder whoever invented underwire bras. And get more wraps." Adjusting her skirt, she started to follow after the vermin as it taunted her before vanishing into the nearby woods.

Three hours.
Three. Fucking. HOURS.
Requiem liked to think she wasn't vain or arrogant but she liked to think her skills that she had spent HER ENTIRE FUCKING LIFE practicing could at the very least help her catch Peter fucking Cottontail and wring his neck. Of course his taunts didn't help either. They had gone from something that (in other circumstances) would have been cute and endearing quickly to vulgar and obscene. Most of which revolved around her bust because of course that's what some perverted rabbit boy would focus on despite her constant threats of a slow painful death involving spoons.

Other than dealing with the strange rabbit's very....descriptive monologue about her assets and how he liked looking at them, Requiem could believe that this would've been fun, "you know, maybe if you weren't so top heavy you could've found me and my treasure by now. Although they would make for a great pillow." A pair of brown paws stuck out from the tree branche above her and made groping motions.

Fuck it, she's turning that thing into a pair of slippers. Requiem jumped and grabbed the lowest branch before climbing up as quick as she could. Little perverted bastard wasn't getting away if she could help it.
.....
Except he wasn't there either. Instead she found herself getting a good view of a clearing with a creek along the far edge. In the middle of the clearing was purple egg with grey stripes and spots on it.

Requiem looked around as she climbed down and slowly approached the egg. Her very unhealthily high blood pressure winding down as she sat with her legs tucked under her in front of it, "Yay! You wiiiiiiiiin! Have the egg and claim your treasuuuuuuuures!" The rabbit danced around her well out of reach with some birds and... a mole? Vole? Some kind of burrowing creature. She couldn't find it in herself to bother trying to strangle the dancing annoyance anymore as she picked up the egg and headed back to town.

Glancing behind her, she saw the creatures were gone, ".....I'm not high enough for this shit."

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